"I Never Knew A Heart [like yours] Existed, Outside Of Make Believe!"
I was talking to my friend Kyle yesterday, about the whole "Blog Scandal" that has been happening this past week. Apparently a lot of people were very angry that i would air their dirty laundry so openly. (Chances are, is that you're reading my blog right now to see if your name, or someone you knows name is in it). Not only are the people immidiately involved a bit perturbed, but the people they sleep with weren't too pleased either. In case you've been living under a rock, i'll spell it out for you: everyone on campus, is sleeping with everyone else. Or... that's what a naturally assumed. (and we all see where that got me!)
Over the past few months, Kyle has been crushing on this guy that we both became acquainted with at Brady's party. He was cute, funny, had an awesome taste in comedians. Not only that, but Kyle and him shared a class together, and frequently got to talk and study together. After hearing that Kyle was interested in him, i told him that he should totally go for it! As any serial dater (like myself) would say, if you want something, go get it. No use sitting around and waiting for it to fall in your lap, right? Nothing will happen in your life if you don't spark change. Plus, living is no fun without a variable or two.
So he did as i suggested. a little light flirting and a few hang outs later, they made a study date! How exciting is that? This super cute boy that he likes, agrees to come and go over some... notes. The lights are dim, with acoustic rock playing in the background. of course you're wearing your most expensive jeans, but play it off like it's totally casual. you offer him a drink, and naturally he accepts. Suddenly you're laughing about the professor's disgusting tweed coat he always wears, and how the tests are so hard that you never seem to get in enough studying. One thing leads to another, and your iPod's shuffle setting starts to play "Black Tongue" by: the Yeah Yeah Yeahs. The look in his eye and the smirk resting on his lips, tell you it's on.
But wait! You're pulled back to reality, where you notice his most recent facebook update, detailing that he's in a relationship with a friend of yours! you laid down all this ground work for this amazing cinematic evening that would ideally lead you to the most amazing first sexual experience. Naturally, you find that he is not available, and the entire time you thought he was interested in you, he wasn't. What a fucking break. How typical.
We have all been in these situations, where you think that you are on the same level with this person, then you're slapped in the face with a harsh dose of reality. Like we all are, Kyle was a bit discouraged. As someone with a third person view, i was a bit confounded as to why this boy wasn't interested. Let's be honest here: Kyle is smart, funny, and has a good head on his shoulders. He's tall and thin, looks great in a tie and vest, and frankly has one of the most developed musical tastes that i've encountered in a long time. (next to my own of course.) ;)
Then i take a look at my most recent interactions with men. Whenever i meet someone that i am interested in, i'm always dropping hints, subtlety making them aware of what a great person they are, and constantly compliment them. i suggest music to them that i think they would like, and insist we go out to fabulous restaurants, always finding an excuse to touch them. Unfortunately it's a rarity that BOYS pick up on such discreet flirtations. I've found that the only way to get a boy's attention is to yell in their face that you want them to fuck you. Even then there are occasions where they are still confused.
For Kyle, that isn't an option. He is the first virgin at CU that i have ever met. He takes the health of his body very seriously (like myself), and doesn't just fuck ANYONE that lives across the hall from him at the dorms. I find that an incredibly attractive personality trait. having respect for yourself and your body is a moral that many of my friends are not familiar with.
I told an old friend of mine (that i recently pissed off), that it wasn't all about the six packs and the bubble butts. Believe it or not, there are more to people than how they can appease your sexual appetites. I personally find that intelligence and charisma can be sexier than any bulge or dimple. However, people need to learn on their own, rather than take my advice. That ultimately results in a plethora of life lessons for me to write about, which keeps all of you reading.
I told Kyle that he shouldn't get discouraged, because he has yet to find someone that has the depth and intelligence that he would need from someone. Plus, it's better to be safe and hold onto something a little longer, than to be sorry about how you lost it. I sure learned that lesson early.
I have a feeling that his spirits are going to be lifted soon. I'm going to visit him this week!
Stay tuned for updates!
Matty B.
